Friday, June 26, 2009

Hello Summer -- Time for a Change


First off, I would just like everyone to know whoever reads this that I finally graduated high school! WHOHOO! Haha. 

I finally saw Never Been Kissed... and it was a wonderful movie.  It made me look back on the time when I was in high school (not that it wasn't that long ago).  High school is different than any other time in your life, at least that's what my mom would always tell me.  And, well, to be quite honest it has.  My time at Notre Dame was one of the best and worst experiences of my life.  I guess you could say it was a unique one.  I have found some friends for a lifetime (or at least I think so) and people who I thought were my friends that ended up not wanting any part of me after we threw our graduation caps.  High school is one of those times when you strive to be something.  This something can be anything.  For some, it can be not being the nerd that you were in middle school and trying out for the football team and recreating yourself.  For others it's a chance to strengthen your passions that you had in middle school.  But, cliques take over.  Cliques will always happen.  It doesn't end in high school. BUT, if we realize the cliques that we are in they can change.  See, the problem is, well at least for me, is that people worry way too much about what people think of them.  I know, it's easier said than done that we shouldn't worry about what people think about us. BUT HERE'S THE THING: PEOPLE DO WORRY ABOUT WHAT OTHER PEOPLE THINK ABOUT THEM. There's a reason why the Entertainment is the reason it is, the reason why media has changed so much than it used to.  True friends are really hard to find.  I remember at one point thinking to myself, "I'll find my bridesmaids in high school and find my husband in college."  Well, you know what, I did find some of my bridesmaids in high school... but at the same time, those will change.  Four years ago even months ago if you were to ask me who my 5 best friends or my good friends they would have changed.  There are friends that you think will be your friends for life. But, you just have to take friendship day by day.  Don't think about how a friend can benefit you or how they make you look.  Like a person for who they are and how they treat you: not what social status they can give you.  To be quite honest, I've realized this mentality now.  I was so caught up in how I was perceived by other people I let some of my BEST friends go unnoticed.  So, for anyone who I was friends with or acquaintances with and I hurt you for some reason, I'm sorry. I'm sorry that I was caught up in my life that I didn't notice you as much as I had hoped.  I'm sorry if I ever used you to get ahead. I'm sorry.  My dad always tells me that there are two words that I use too often.  The first one is friend.  Think today we have gotten so caught up in what a friend means that what it really means is an acquaintance.  The problem is that we look for friends with benefits... and no, I don't mean the sexual kind, I mean we look for people that we can say, "oh yeah, I know them, there one of my friends". But the thing is, they aren't your friend, they are someone that you know and someone that you may have had a heart to heart with.  I know I'm guilty of this. I really am I.  I have said that a bunch of times. But, from now on, I'm going to look at friendship differently and I hope you will too.